Movies: For those of you in New York, your absolute priority this weekend must be seeing the ebullient teen comedy “Spork.” The rest of you can wallow in the pretentious mire of Terrence Malick’s “The Tree of Life.” Television: Now that “Oprah,” “American Idol,” and “Dancing with the Stars” are out of the way, enjoy some classics on TCM. Jump in the pool with their Esther Williams weekend. Books: “Alfred Kazin’s Journals” is the must-have book for the literati; I’m still trying to decide whether to read Steven Tyler’s memoir. Sports: I’m so disgusted that the Heat are in the NBA finals that I’m turning back to the NHL playoffs. The main event, however, is Saturday‘s Barca/Man United soccer final. Music: Turn off the Adele and Lady Gaga! Listen to Rosalyn Tureck play Bach. Finally: It’s Memorial Day. Put flowers on a grave!