VMAs: Bey-Bey’s Bump, Gaga’s Guy

The opening fifteen minutes of the MTV Video Music Awards last night were a hot mess — almost as much of a hot mess as Nicki Minaj‘s outfit. Lady Gaga opened the festivities in a drag-king get-up — her alter ego, Joe Calderone. She resembled the lead in a bus-and-truck version of “Grease 2.” And her “You and I” song is a cross between Elton and the Piano Man. Kevin Hart followed, playing non-host (the evening, to its detriment, had no host) and butchered the English language in a desperately unfunny way. You know an evening is in trouble when Britney Spears, the winner of the first award, raised the level of the proceedings. Gaga’s return later in the evening to give Britney the Michael Jackson award was awkward and unwitty. Of course, no one could top Beyonce’s red-carpet announcement of her pregnancy, or rubbing her belly (after a trying-too-hard performance) to reinforce the news while onstage. Thank God for Adele.

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